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Still need more information? Tired of having to do everything yourself, including yourself? Do you need to fuck something a little different than your hand tonight?

Not into getting down and dirty on your own self? You need to fuck tonight, my friend. But what do you do when all your usual booty-calls aren't answering the phone?

What happens if your friends with benefits are out of town? What happens when skype sex just isn't enough, and you need a warm body? Well, sometimes the usual avenues of finding a fuck buddy are all blocked.

Sometimes you need to try some unorthodox methods to get laid. Here are some wild tips and tricks to help you get fucked tonight:. I know you have girls' numbers in your phone that you barely know.

Maybe you have a girl's digits from an old class or an old job. Maybe you're friends with some girls on social media who you'd definitely be down to fuck.

Shoot these girls a text. Slide into the DM's. See what they're doing tonight. If they're going out, there's a good chance that their girlfriends will be going with them which can increase your chances of getting laid!

The worst thing that can happen is that they say no or don't respond. Try to brush off the paranoid feeling you might be getting roasted in a group chat for daring to DM and text another few girls or try one of these other tips!

Let's be real: Tinder is mostly a game now. No one actually uses it as a means of dating or talking anymore. The only time you'd ever message someone on Tinder is if you're trolling around like you used to do on Omegle in middle school, or if you're trying to fuck as soon as physically possible.

So get swiping right, boy. Shoot your shot and shoot it like buckshot: wide. Message everyone and try to get a conversation going!

Hopefully, that conversation will lead to a "what are you doin' tonight? So I just wanted to put that out there and not to say every woman needs 30 minutes of warmup and orgasms to be ready for penetration.

You can fuck with pegging and prostate massage, by the way. Men can be the ones being penetrated. Charlotte Rose : Yes. Most women will need at least 30 minutes of warmup.

There are very few women, statistically speaking, that are ready for quick penetration. Chris Rose : And the more foreplay, the more seduction you have in your relationship as a whole, the more her body will be ready for this kind of fucking energy.

You can look for seduction on the podcast archive. When they feel erotic, they feel sexy as they walk through the world, and that is preparation that goes beyond the scope of this podcast.

But it is not about being disrespected or being less of than. Chris Rose : Right. What does it mean? Charlotte Rose : Because fucking is a very physical primal experience, there are certain kinds movements that are more related to this kind of sex than lovemaking, for instance.

Most obvious are rhythm and speed. With fucking, you are more likely to do more of a deep thrust that has a real-. Charlotte Rose : I know, like a real kind of force to it.

Charlotte Rose : Pausing, and being still sometimes. Fucking is faster. Chris Rose : But you get to this point of a nice driving, forceful rhythm, which also means staying in a rhythm for a while.

So I think, yes, as you said, speed, you build up to it and it eventually gets faster. Then the rhythm is that constant driving, not letting up feeling until one or both of you climaxes.

You build up and you kind of stay there and draw it out. Chris Rose : A lot of women report the feeling of their cervixes being stimulated by that deep thrusting, rhythmic penetration, activates the cervix.

The cervix has specific nerves that run to the brain and are hooked up into our arousal system in this very primal way. The cervix can be very tender on some women and other women love this feeling and even love the day after.

Their cervix can even feel a little bit bruised, a little bit-. So the cervix, little anatomy lesson, is the entrance to the uterus.

That would be really uncomfortable and painful for many women. The cervix is only going to feel delicious-. Charlotte Rose : Yes, is only going to feel good when it is really, really warmed up.

You have to start from the outside of the body and move deeper and deeper into the body and the arousal builds and ….

This is where the artistry of fucking comes in. This is the emotional part. This is the seduction part. This is the relationship part of fucking, and that can build up inside of you as an individual, and then it builds up between you as you do the foreplay as you gracefully enter this intensity.

If you are a size queen and want it to be super filled up and really deep and really big, they make dildos in all sorts of sizes.

Charlotte Rose : Okay. But the other thing that you can do is wear a butt plug. If you are experiencing that you want more-.

Charlotte Rose : Well, both, but the woman could wear a butt plug to feel more filled up. Chris Rose : Or use lots of fingers and go to fisting, which is actually one of our most popular podcast episodes, is our episode on how to fist and most women will be satisfied with the size of your fist if they can take it.

That, I think, is the idea of being fucked, is used, exhausted, done. Charlotte Rose : Remember, though, in our culture we often think about the men fucking and the women more laying still.

Remember that the women can be really active in this experience and push back. Charlotte Rose : Thrust back into them.

You can be active in this. Chris Rose : , find it in our podcast archive. It is a companion episode. If you have not figured out yet how to move during sex, the experience of fucking and being fucked will be hard to access.

Chris Rose : Yes, so how to move, how to fuck, these two episodes go hand in hand together and put it into practice. So much of this is about giving yourself permission to stop holding back.

We hold back. The core of the emotions of fucking is not holding back. All of those inhibitions are gone. They have been checked at the door and you are an animal doing your human thing of fucking.

We talk about fucking like animals, but animal sex is actually really boring. Most animals thrust one to three times before ejaculatio, and if you look up animal sex on YouTube, most of it is very boring.

Humans are the fucking machines. Humans are the most creative, erotic beings on the face of this planet. We have a very creative, awesome sexuality.

Even with just our minds and even with just our voice, we can bring one another to these high states of arousal. Chris Rose : This idea of athletic sex, circling back to that.

We talked about that at the beginning of this episode of being willing to get sweaty, being willing to get breathless, being willing to use our muscles to really fuck.

Using that thrusting again and again and again to fuck well is an athletic feat. How about we get better at fucking and build those muscles, build our stamina, build our endurance so we can be better fucking humans?

Charlotte Rose : This is not less intimate. It can be just as intimate in a physical way, perhaps not as emotional, but there all kinds of different intimacy.

Just not just being loved for who you are, but also being loved for your body. Sometimes people cry. Sometimes people laugh. Sometimes people feel rage.

All of those emotions can be part of fucking, you just channel it into the physical plane. That, I think, is what can be therapeutic as you harness all of those emotions and you bring them out physically.

You release those endorphins. Your endorphins are flowing. Check it out if that is something that happens for you.

Chris Rose : So go fuck, my dear friends. Go fuck your hearts out. Build up your endurance for fucking. So we hope this has helped you discover how to fuck with more fucking authenticity, more fucking enthusiasm, and we hope you enjoy your fucking day.

Chris Rose : We are the Pleasure Mechanics. You can find us at pleasuremechanics. If you want to fuck with greatness, our foreplay mastery course is a must.

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